Please welcome Paula Constantino, my guest blogger this week, to talk about a special (and worthy) project she’s launching that she could use your help with!
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Remember how good you felt when you went out of your way to help someone without even thinking about getting anything in return? Felt really good didn’t it?
In our running here, there and everywhere - often with our cell phones in hand - we sometimes lose sight of how truly wonderful it feels when we reach out and help others, giving back to our community or even more globally. How we give back is a purely individual choice, but we all should give serious consideration to giving back in some way or another.
This may seem like a giant leap… but a new paradigm is emerging in the world, embracing the revolution of the heart with the capability to change the world from the roots up. We now know how to position women globally to make a positive impact on the world for generations to come.
By harnessing 21st century technology, we can inspire, enlighten and empower women worldwide by providing them with practical, useful life and business skills – information that is easy to access, easy to use and easy to pass on to others. With your help – giving back in whatever way you find comfortable – we can enable women to think differently, improve their quality of life, and position women worldwide to co-exist peacefully.
Although we currently have more than 150 women mentors in place to provide the information modules, we can always use more expertise, but we could really use some help to fund the implementation of this worldwide movement, that is starting locally in the Washington, DC area.
You may be wondering how I came up with this movement. As the product of an extremely dysfunctional family that included being victim of sexual abuse, I have always been a survivor. Despite moving up and down the East coast and attending more than twenty-five different schools, I have been determined to not only turn my own life around, but to reach out and help other women be all that they can be.
Having been fully immersed the “the ole’ boy” world during my career as a lawyer, I believe that when we work together to help others succeed – sharing our expertise and wisdom – we all truly do achieve more. And it feels good, too!
Giving back is rewarding on so many levels. As you’re thinking about giving back, you might want to check out our nonprofit and maybe “Chip-In” toward our launch www.1000WomenCanChangeTheWorld.org.
For more information Contact: Paula Constantino paula@w-s-team.com or 410-707-7378
The good news is: I just moved my office to a better space. The bad news is: I had to move my office. All that paper, those files – UGH! It’s not really bad news, though. I had time to go through my files and PURGE! Oh, how nice it felt! I was also able to reorganize my files that had gotten so out of hand. How does that happen?
This whole experience has really gotten me turned on to the idea of a PAPERLESS OFFICE. I know I can’t go totally sans paper because there are just some things I need to have in hard copy. Reading articles, for example, is very difficult for me on a computer screen if they’re over a certain number of pages. It just doesn’t feel right, especially if it is something I wrote. I need to have hard copy that I can mark up and expand on in the margins. I know you can do that with Word – sort of. It just isn’t the same.
But for me, everything else is GOING DIGITAL! I’m embarking on a mission to simplify my office and my life by eliminating as much paper as I possibly can. Good for me, good for the environment. I’m just getting started, but I’ve already come up with tips on what you need to do to go paperless:
Invest in an easy-to-use scanner. It doesn’t have to be high-end quality as I’ve found you don’t need a really high resolution device if all you’re doing is archiving. Just so you can see what’s on the paper should you need to print it is good enough. Mine is a multi-function printer/scanner/fax machine with a document feeder – an essential add-on for hands-free scanning, especially of multi-page documents. It hooks right up to my computer and creates the image.
Switch to online statements and bills. If you’re not already doing it, you’re probably like me and afraid that you’ll miss something if you don’t have that bill staring you in the face. We use QuickBooks to schedule our business bills that need to be paid and Quicken to set up reminders for the home bills. The challenge becomes when you don’t open those programs on a regular basis, but I have a reminder set up in Outlook to pay bills. I haven’t missed one yet!
Buy Adobe Acrobat. No, I’m not talking about the free reader that allows you to view PDF files. This one allows you to create them, too, which is a great way to archive off documents and e-mails that you would otherwise have to print. You can get the old 8.0 version for under $200 and it is worth the investment. I am not even familiar with all the capabilities, but just the ability to send out contracts and proposal in an unchangeable but readable format is worth the price. If you’re a pro at all Acrobat has to offer, please e-mail me! I would love to learn more.
Set up a good filing system on your computer. Storage for digital files on your computer needs to be just as organized as a paper-based filing system. Better yet – purchase software that is supposed to be able to help you find anything on your computer. They even have software that can act as a file and retrieve system. If anyone has recommendations on these types of systems, please share them!
Make sure you back up your system. The last thing you want to do is have all your records on your hard drive and then it gets a virus or crashes and you can’t retrieve anything. You should be backing up your system ANYWAY, but even more so when you go paperless.
I’m not there yet, but who wants in? I’m challenging you to join me in my quest for the paperless office. What have you got to lose other than a few hundred pounds of paper??
Those of you who have been following know that I am learning how to juggle. Correction: I have LEARNED how to juggle! I’m not quite ready to pick up the knives yet, but my next goal is to be able to juggle during my one of my presentations. I figure it is good to illustrate physical juggling when you’re talking about how to juggle the many things in your life as they both have so much in common: they’re not easy, it take concentrated effort, and sometimes, no matter how hard you try - something gets dropped. I’m not there yet but will keep on practicing.
Having learned this new skill made me think about setting and celebrating goals. First off, learning how to juggle made me very uncomfortable at first. I felt like an idiot (and amused my kids at the same time). You see, I had gotten comfortable once again with what I was doing. I had been operating in my ‘zone.’ It was time to shake it up a bit and try something new. When is the last time you tried a new skill? Whether it is something physical or not, if you’re not growing, you’re…what? Shrinking? Maybe standing still? Neither are good options.
The other lesson I learned about goal setting is that it is so easy to reach a goal and quickly move on to the next without relishing the accomplishment. Before I start worrying about trying to juggle glass balls (my ultimate goal!) I need to celebrate the fact that I learned to juggle at all! Show it off! Enjoy it! Maybe put on a red nose and do a couple of children’s parties (OK…maybe not that…). My point is, take the time to celebrate when you reach your goal before you charge off onto the next one. This is the premise behind my Whispers and Roars journals that I am working to develop and bring to market (yes…STILL!). I’m having trouble finding just the right vendor but when I do, you’ll be the first to know!
What have learned about setting (and reaching) goals? Do you celebrate or charge ahead? Share your tips with others!
I got that letter in the mail that every person, entrepreneur or not, fears: a letter from the IRS with the word audit in it. Thankfully, it isn’t a full audit, but it has been a pain just the same. The most intimidating thing about the letter was the list of documents they needed a copy of, all from 2005 except one, which dated back to 1998. YIKES!
The first thought I had when I saw the list of what I needed to submit was there’s no way I’m going to find all these things. It may be hard for some of you to believe, but I am not a very detailed-oriented nor organized person. Don’t get me wrong - I can be when I need to be, but it doesn’t come naturally. The good news (and a prudent lesson for any leader) is that I had hired people much more capable than myself in areas I felt weak. This happened to be one of those areas. Thanks to my super-organized Controller and COO, I was able to fish the 2005 boxes out of my basement and quickly find not only canceled checks but in-depth details of the transactions I needed. The document from 1998 was gone but a call to our vendor and they were able to fax us an archived version of the information we needed. Any holes remaining in our records were filled by our long-time accountant. Thank goodness for them (did I say that out loud?)!
Through this experience I have developed a new appreciation for detail-oriented and organized people. Even though I am running as a solo-preneur right now, I’ve maintained the record keeping set up and organization I had when I had 24 people working for me. Sometimes it feels like overkill, but it is easier to keep it organized now than it would be to dig through it and find information later. After all, you never know when the IRS will come knocking!
It happens in business and in life. Whatever project or idea we’re working on comes to a stopping point. Sometimes the abrupt halt comes from an external obstacle like a lack of money or people, but other times the stumble is internal. We run out of energy. Another project captures our attention. We just lose faith in what we’re doing and why. If you’re experiencing this, know that you are NOT ALONE and there are ways around it.
In my life, I’ve found that hitting the wall usually has meaning, but it isn’t always what we think it is. Yes, sometimes it is an indicator that we need to stop and other times it is just a sign that we need to take a different direction or back off for a bit. But how do you know? I’ve come up with three steps to take to see whether this wall is truly a barrier or just a minor detour or annoyance:
1. Take a break. That’s right, sometimes you just need to step back from a situation, let the emotion settle, and then look at it again. When we’re in the middle of something it is very hard to observe it objectively. With some separation and diversion of our attention, the solution can become clear.
2. Ask a friend or mentor for help. Sometimes we’re afraid to tell someone else what we’re thinking, especially if we’re thinking about quitting something, for fear that they’ll think we’re stupid or just weak. If you have the right friends and personal advisors (or even better, a Mastermind Group!), they’ll help you work through the issue and look at it from different perspectives.
3. Take action. Getting stuck in analysis paralysis adds to the frustration. Many times, just taking action – even if it’s small – can help kick-start the forward motion. Even if it is the wrong action, if it is small enough it can be righted and at least it got you moving!
The philosophy that works for me is to choose not to focus on the obstacles because I’ve found that increases your chances of hitting them. You have to acknowledge them, but then focus on the path around them, the Path Forward.
How do you deal when you hit the wall? Any tried and true ways to forge ahead??
Lessons about work and life turn up in the most unsuspecting places.
As some of you know, I am trying to learn how to juggle. It seems silly, really, but my goal is to be able to add it to my work/life balance presentations. What better visual of how hard it really is to juggle our lives than to try juggling some balls!
So I haven’t been practicing as much as I should but I have been asking around for a Juggling Coach. Yes, I put that intention out there and the universe answered in an unbelievable way. Last week, I started training a group of awesome women entrepreneurs from South Africa and took my juggling balls with me to see if any of them knew how to juggle and could teach me. No such luck. HOWEVER, as we were leaving a late-night reception around 8:00 pm, we came upon the UMBC Juggling Club, one of many juggling clubs in the area. Who knew!? I was actually ready to continue walking by when my fellow ACTiVATE instructor Renee Lewis (standing next to me in the photo below) pulled me over to them. “You’re not missing this opportunity.” Thank goodness for friends.
We spent the next 45 minutes with a couple of student members of the juggling club as they, well, taught us to juggle. In that brief training session I learned some important lessons not only about mastering the art of juggling but also about life and work:
1. Relax. Don’t try so hard. Just let it happen.
How many times do we take ourselves and whatever crisis we’re reacting to at the moment too seriously? There is a difference between working hard and struggling. I don’t think it is supposed to be a struggle if you’re in the right place pursuing the right things.
2. Slow down. Take the time to find the rhythm and work into it.
Not unlike #1, but distinct in important ways. So often we get going so fast because we think everything is a race. If we can learn to plan a little bit better, we don’t have to live in last-minute mode. I should learn to take my own advice on this one.
3. You will mess up. Accept it and get over it. Oh, and try not to hurt anyone.
Failure is a given when you’re trying something new or big. Be OK with that. I know I’ve said it a million times, if you’re not failing you’re not taking enough risks. Just make sure you learn from it and move on without taking anyone else out along the way.
4. Get bigger balls.
Really! The balls I was trying to learn with were too small. I’ve ordered a set of heavier ones and I’ll let you know how that goes. As for the life and business lessons, I’m going to be careful here because this could get ugly. My point here is that even though it seems like it would be harder to juggle larger objects it is actually easier when you’re training your muscles to remember the motion. You can’t be afraid of what you think might be harder because in reality, it might be just what you need to continue moving forward.
So the bottom line on this for me: be careful what you put out there in the universe – you might just meet a crazy band of jugglers and learn something unexpected! Oh, and the Juggling Club is in the UMBC Commons every Wednesday night from 8:00 - 10:00 pm. They claim that they can teach anyone to juggle if they really want to. Anyone want to join me??
Those of you who know me (or who have seen me in the summer) know that my hair is naturally very curly. God gave me curls and I spend most of my time trying to lose them. So as I was packing for my recent trip to Thailand, I made sure I had a power converter so my hair straightener (called a flat iron) would work. I learned the hard way that I needed one when we were in Italy last year. I guess those 220 volts shooting into my 110 volt appliance wasn’t good - I fried my Chi just by plugging it into the wall. So this time, I was prepared…or so I thought.
The first night I was there I had been out at the pool and walking around town and was badly in need of a shower. I was supposed to meet some folks for dinner so I had to make it quick. Yea, right. When I plugged in the flat iron I didn’t smell that awful odor of electronics burning so I thought I was safe. I wasn’t going to toast two of them, but this one wasn’t even getting hot. Nothing. I tried it in the little shaver outlet in the bathroom too, but didn’t get anything other than a strange hum that couldn’t have been good. Hungry, I decided to go au-natural and left with a wet head to go eat dinner. My hair looked fine at first but by the time I got back to my room after supper the frizz had settled in. I had to make a presentation the next morning to 150 people and this was just not how I had envisioned doing it. I had to make a plan.
One thing that I have always found helpful in difficult situations is to accept the worst and then work to improve it. Worst case: I have frizzy hair. Most of the people who were going to be in the audience didn’t know me, though they’ll think I did a bait-and-switch on the head shots in the conference program. They would think I meant to wear my hair in a frizz ball. Once I had accepted that, I then worked to improve upon it. I wanted to make sure that wasn’t what happened.
As it turned out, the hotel had a converter that I could use, which is the one in the picture. Yes, it looks a little scary and the hum made me a little nervous, but it worked. I may need to get myself checked out for radiation poisoning at some point, but thankfully I made my presentation with perfectly strait locks. Even if I hadn’t I was ready.
How often in our lives and our businesses do we get to the first part – imagining the worst – and then stop there? Dwelling on the negative does not help. Accept the worst case scenario and then move on, working like heck to make sure it doesn’t come to pass. Although this particular incident may be trivial, I’ve had plenty other opportunities to practice this philosophy when the stakes were higher – a lost customer, an illness, or bad economic forecast – and I know it works. Have you tried it? How do you deal with unexpected events that may not be so good?
Can you go without your cell phone or your Blackberry for a whole week?
For one week this past month, I actually went without my cell phone or my Blackberry. That’s right – nothing. Zip. Oh, OK, I DID have my laptop, but since I was in Thailand and 12 hours ahead, it wasn’t the same. Unless I was up in the middle of the night (which I was on occasion) I couldn’t really engage in e-mail or IM banter. So during the daylight hours, I was essentially incommunicado. Blackout. Not being bothered by urgent requests or details of what’s going on that I can’t do anything about anyway. And I have to tell you that although it was odd at first, it was really nice!
The funny thing was, I would see someone such as the gentleman on the right, who just couldn’t sit through an elephantshow in Thailand without pulling out his Treo. Is that what we’ve come to? Are we that addicted!? I challenge you to take one week without your Crackberry…
What I found while I was away was that when I got home, my world and my work were just as I had left them. No fires that went untended, no clients offended by my absence. That’s because I made sure I did one important thing before I left. I COMMUNICATED.
I let clients and potential clients know that I would be out of the country and unreachable.
I let my family know where and how to reach me in an emergency. Not expecting to hear from me made the after-school calls from SKYPE on my computer (only $0.02 per minute!) an extra special surprise for my kids.
I let any callers know, via my outgoing voice mail greeting, that I was not checking messages and would call them when I returned.
I made sure any projects were up-to-date or someone else was running with what needed to be done.
Ok, I was only gone for a week, but the world went on spinning and life went on living without me there. Sure, my kids and hubby missed me and I missed them.
To make sure I could always get away – and I did this with my former company, ACT, as well – I made myself expendable. After all - job security isn’t what it used to be. For entrepreneurs, you’ll never grow your company and still have a life unless at least parts of your business can operate without you. If you work for someone else, training your replacement is a good way to stand out when promotion time comes. So when was the last time you tried to make yourself expendable? How about working on that now?
Don’t laugh, but I’ve decided to teach myself how to juggle. For those of you women entrepreneurs like me, especially you moms, we already know how to juggle our lives, or at least we’re trying. Every day it seems like there is more than one ball that needs to be kept in the air between work responsibilities, home, kids, spouse, etc. But what I’m talking about here is the physical act of juggling. Yes, I went out and bought a set of three small bean-bag balls to learn how to juggle and in all honesty, it has turned out to be harder than I thought. So you’re probably asking yourself - why in the world would you want to do that? It is simple: I feel like I need to learn something new that is physical. I believe that by expanding my physical capabilities I will also augment my mental and emotional capabilities at the same time.
Think about it: when is the last time you really challenged yourself physically? As entrepreneurs, we feel challenged mentally and emotionally every day, but the physical stuff…not so much so. Sure, I exercise and maybe try to do one more set of repetitions with my weights, but that’s not the same thing. I am talking about doing something that you’ve never done before. Something you’ve always wanted to do.
One thing that I’ve noticed in my attempts to juggle thus far is that I am failing…A LOT. I drop more balls than I catch but find the failure good for me. It’s humbling. It’s FREEING. I don’t HAVE to be good at everything I do. By trying something new, I’ve given myself permission to be a student again. To learn. To practice. To grow. I’ve given up the notion that this new skill is something I can acquire in a weekend. It’s going to take longer and it’s going to take a lot of practice. That’s a good lesson to embrace, because every new thing we do in life generally takes practice. It takes time. And most of the time, it’s uncomfortable. I mean - my kids LAUGH at me (lovingly, of course). But they’re no better at it.
In talking with mom entrepreneurs, I realized that by definition of what we do we are all jugglers. I don’t think it is limited to parents, either, because I know many folks without kids who happen to have lives outside of the companies their building or running. Really - it’s possible! So one of my other goals in taking on this new challenge is that when I give a speech to busy people and talk about balance, I want to be able to stand on the stage and juggle. In front of everyone. Crazy? Perhaps. But I’m doing it anyways! Ok, you can go ahead and laugh.
So when is the last time you physically tried something new? Did you find that you grew in other ways? What did you learn about yourself??
things. It may be hard for some of you to believe, but I am not a very detailed-oriented nor organized person. Don’t get me wrong - I can be when I need to be, but it doesn’t come naturally. The good news (and a prudent lesson for any leader) is that I had hired people much more capable than myself in areas I felt weak. This happened to be one of those areas. Thanks to my super-organized Controller and COO, I was able to fish the 2005 boxes out of my basement and quickly find not only canceled checks but in-depth details of the transactions I needed. The document from 1998 was gone but a call to our vendor and they were able to fax us an archived version of the information we needed. Any holes remaining in our records were filled by our long-time accountant. Thank goodness for them (did I say that out loud?)!
In my life, I’ve found that hitting the wall usually has meaning, but it isn’t always what we think it is. Yes, sometimes it is an indicator that we need to stop and other times it is just a sign that we need to take a different direction or back off for a bit. But how do you know? I’ve come up with three steps to take to see whether this wall is truly a barrier or just a minor detour or annoyance:
As it turned out, the hotel had a converter that I could use, which is the one in the picture. Yes, it looks a little scary and the hum made me a little nervous, but it worked. I may need to get myself checked out for radiation poisoning at some point, but thankfully I made my presentation with perfectly strait locks. Even if I hadn’t I was ready.
Don’t laugh, but I’ve decided to teach myself how to juggle. For those of you women entrepreneurs like me, especially you moms, we already know how to juggle our lives, or at least we’re trying. Every day it seems like there is more than one ball that needs to be kept in the air between work responsibilities, home, kids, spouse, etc. But what I’m talking about here is the physical act of juggling. Yes, I went out and bought a set of three small bean-bag balls to learn how to juggle and in all honesty, it has turned out to be harder than I thought. So you’re probably asking yourself - why in the world would you want to do that? It is simple: I feel like I need to learn something new that is physical. I believe that by expanding my physical capabilities I will also augment my mental and emotional capabilities at the same time.
