Marci Alboher knows me. We’ve never met, but it is clear from her new book, One Person/Multiple Careers: A New Model for Work / Life Success (Warner Books) that she has my number.

Although not specifically a book about entrepreneurs, Marci’s book speaks directly to me as a ParentPreneur. She introduces a new term –slash – which makes me an author/consultant/speaker in slash-speak. Most entrepreneurs I know, especially women entrepreneurs, are slashes, too.

The slash idea, as Marci has so aptly observed, is about recognizing our own personal complexity and embracing the multiplicity of our passions. It is about designing our own life by not being afraid to follow our dreams, even when they take us down seemingly unrelated paths at the same time. How often does trying to raise a family and build a business seem like divergent paths? But yet we continue on and find ways to make it work.

In this engaging book Ms. Alboher, who herself is a slash as an author/journalist/speaker, shares stories of how other people – with a chapter dedicated to working parents - make their slash lives work and offers tips for aspiring business owners on the personal side of what is needed to survive as someone who carries multiple business cards. So if your answer to the question “What do you do?” depends on who is asking or you have various interests you hesitate pursuing because you don’t think they fit well together, you may be a slash, too. Marci’s book will entertain you with stories of others who are slashes and enlighten you with ways to successfully juggle your particular present/future/desired interests.

Last week after we returned home from our vacation, my daughter and I went to our local Border’s book store to see my book on the shelves. Imagine our surprise and my embarrassment when my book was no where to be found. When I inquired at the information desk, I was given someone else to follow up with. I hid my dismay from my daughter, but knew I had to do something about it. I really wanted her to see it on the shelf. Ok, I really wanted to see it, too.

As soon as I got home, I called and e-mailed the contact name I had been given and then waited patiently. In my e-mail I explained that not only was I a LOCAL author, but that I profiled several successful entrepreneurs from across the Baltimore/Washington D.C. area. Less than 24 hours after my request, I received a reply. Not only had the local contact responded, but because Wiley is my publisher, she had contacted the national account and event manager. They expressed an interest in not only getting my books into their stores (I found out it was in some area stores), but they wanted to work with my publisher to put together an area-wide book signing tour. So I went from not even having my book in my local store to planning an area-wide campaign. See what happens when you ask?! Don’t ever forget that YOU are your best advocate. If you don’t go for what you want and deserve, no one else will do it for you! What have you got to lose!?

I received an e-mail from a young (20-something) woman, newly married and no kids (that she knows of). She had read an advanced copy of my book and got so much more out of it than she (or I) had expected! Without going into the details, she had been receiving pressure from her family about quitting her job when she became a mom. After reading my book, she says she “finally feels released of that pressure.” She went on to say that The ParentPreneur Edge was one of those “…rare ‘reads’ that moved (her) and allowed (her) to learn and grow in ways that (she) truly believes will have an amazingly positive impact on her future.” Wow. I literally cried when I read that. THAT is why I wrote the book - to have a positive impact on others, though admittedly I imagined parents getting the most out of the book. Who knew?! You don’t have to be a parent to get it. That is better than any good book review or media coverage. That is real!

I finally got a chance to see a copy of my book yesterday, the full finished product. It was delivered before noon but I promised my kids I would wait until they got home from school to open the boxes. I have been waiting so long already; it wasn’t hard to put it off for a few more hours. And when I saw the looks on their faces when they saw the boxes from the publisher, I knew I had made the right choice. They were so excited they couldn’t stand it. The looks of pride on their face as they saw their names in print on the dedication page made it all worth the wait. That’s when the tears began to pool in my eyes. Not because it had been such a long and tortuous process or because I had been up nights waiting for the book to be finished, but because like everything, the kids brought it all into perspective. Not that I didn’t relish in the monumental personal satisfaction this accomplishment provided, but experiencing the effect my achievement had on my daughters and the model it gave them for following their own dreams was, well, priceless.

The next milestone will be seeing the book on the shelves in our local Border’s and Barnes and Noble…only a couple more weeks for that one! It should be in all US bookstores by June 22nd. Shortly thereafter, on to Europe and the UK….

I was talking with my friend the other day when she lamented how tired she was of her routine. It wasn’t that she didn’t like her chosen profession - she loved what she did. She was just tired of it following the same pattern, the same drudgery day in and day out. I had to admit to her – I had no idea what she was talking about. Ever since the first day I went out on my own 12 years ago, I can’t say that sameness has been a problem. On the contrary, there are days when I wish I could know what to expect.

If you find that you are comfortable with routine and like to know what is going to happen next, don’t become an entrepreneur (or a mother, for that matter!). You don’t know when, you don’t know where, but you can be sure that things will not go as planned at some point. In my book I call this “Spit (up) Happens” and the best advice I can give new business owners is to expect the unexpected. For example, I started the company without contracts – I did work based on a hand shake. When our first large (six figure) opportunity came up, I knew in my gut we had to formalize the agreement. Even though I had a strong relationship with this client and there was a great deal of trust between us, I had to treat the transaction as just business. It was a good thing I did, because shortly after it turned into a multi-million dollar deal, my customer was bought out by a multi-billion dollar company. I would have been at risk of losing the business had I not had our agreement formalized.

Do you have anything that you have done to prepare for the unexpected? How about  going against your gut instinct and then regretting it?

I am not a television watcher, but when an idea wakes you up in the wee hours of the morning, the TV offers some company in the otherwise silent night. This morning a rerun of “Roseanne” was on, which I didn’t watch when it was on prime time but was better than being sold on losing 115 pounds in 8 months with a body makeover.

This particular episode had a humorous exchange between two men – one was crying over a lost love and the other was not particularly good at dealing with emotions. His advice to his sobbing friend was to ‘get over it.’ He told him to quit his crying, dust himself off, and move on. What refreshing advice.

How many times do we spend too much energy over-analyzing a failure? It is natural to mourn a loss or be sad when things don’t work out the way we wanted, but to let a disappointment paralyze us or keep us from doing what needs to be done is criminal. Evaluate the situation, learn from it what you can, and move on! Bad things happen and while there are some things we can do nothing about, we can control how we react.

One of my first management hires in my company years ago was a gentleman who had a lot more management experience than I did, but his approach was not consistent with our culture. I gave this man too much leeway and it cost me. He lasted about five months, which was four months too long. In the end, I felt like a failure. However, when I looked at what I learned from it, I realized the lesson was a valuable one and helped me to continue to grow my business.

Successful entrepreneurs have mastered the art of learning from failure. Read Rich Dad Robert Kiyosaki’s book, Before You Quit Your Job and you’ll see how many times he failed but learned from the experience. Sometimes, you can even learn more from a failure than from success – it’s all in how you look at it. So when is the last time you failed? If you’re not failing, you’re not taking enough risks.

Passion is a critical element of successful entrepreneurship…I talk about it everywhere I go. In speeches or in class, I tell my students that you must have passion for what you do. What happens when passion becomes a problem?

Over the past several weeks, I have been obsessed. I am having a problem putting work aside. I have so many ideas in my head that just have to complete, I can’t focus on anything else. I am not even sleeping well (when I do get to bed) and when I am home, I am not really home. The problem is I love what I am doing! I am so excited about it I have thrown myself way out of balance. The good thing is, I know it and can fix it.

I am taking the afternoon off to take my daughters shopping and – get this - I might even take the weekend off! I decided that tasks that feel so urgent now will just have to go undone. I’ve met my outside responsibilities and all that is left is my internal driver to contend with - I can shut her up! I’ll just keep my little notebook with me and write down ideas and to-dos when they hit me and move on. I am officially letting go…at least for a while.

What do you do to let go? Do you do it often enough?

I recently attended a lively presentation at the Women In Business conference by Sheila Heinze, Founder of SM Consulting. At $70M in revenues and over 500 employees, she runs the largest woman-owned business in Baltimore. Although I interviewed Sheila for my book, I had never heard her present her story in person. Interestingly, she used the same analogy with her business that I do in my book: start ups as babies, progressing to school-age years, and then, where she is now, the teen years. In my book I go a step further to ‘letting go’, but Sheila isn’t ready for that just yet.

She made a profound statement that I think surprised some of the women listening: even at $70M in revenues, she has no posse. Entrepreneurs, in general, do not get a posse. There is no one there to carry Sheila’s luggage or pick up her dry cleaning. In fact, she relayed a humorous story that occurred just that morning. She had a meeting in the afternoon so she and her husband were trading cars so that he could pick up their daughters after school. He loaded the car and left to take the girls to school. Shortly after he departed, Sheila realized she had left her umbrella in her car and, with the pouring rain, had to find a replacement. Wouldn’t you know – the only one left in the house was her 4-year-old daughter’s. Without any choices and late for her meeting, she grabbed it and ran. So not only did she NOT have someone to carry her umbrella, she went into a meeting carrying a pink Cinderella umbrella with pretty ruffles. A true mark of a ParentPreneur…

So if you’re considering going into business for the status of it, you should really reconsider. Just like being a parent, the outside gratification for a job well done is almost always delayed. Don’t do it for the posse…you’ll get wet in the rain waiting for someone to carry your umbrella. Just grab Cinderella and go!

I talk to my ACTiVATE students constantly about leveraging “Who you Know”. Networking to make new connections and then keeping in touch with the right ones is critical to success in life and business. So when I attended the Stevie Awards last week, I was disappointed that ACTiVATE did not win an award (we were a finalist in the Women Helping Women category), but I was thrilled with the incredible women I met. My table was lucky – we had four winners out of the ten at the table. I went out to dinner with a couple of them and heard a story that reinforced my belief that owning a business is the ultimate empowerment tool.

Tereson Thomas founded Fuzzi Bunz to provide her with a vehicle to get out of her failing marriage. Talking with her was inspiring. It is hard to imagine building a business out of reusable diapers (that she invented!), much less a multi-million dollar business, in this day of disposables. She has also managed to grow the business so that she maintains a good balance with raising her children. She won the Entrepreneur of the Year award.

I also met Carolyn Kepcher, who was on Trump’s left on The Apprentice until last fall. She was presenting awards. Although we didn’t win one, I went up and talked to her afterwards. I knew she was “let go” from the Trump organization but I didn’t know that she is now starting her own company to empower women in business! She is also planning to find more time to spend with her 6 and 4 year old children. After a brief conversation, she is considering writing the forward to my book. Talk about synchronicity!

Wendy Piersall, who writes the eMom blog, was not able to attend the awards but we connected via e-mail. She was up for the “Best Website” award. We’re now looking at ways to work together, and I will start by providing articles for her website.

Another woman at my table was from Fortune Magazine. I followed up with her after the event but received the “if we have any projects come up that fit your skills I’ll let you know” rejection. That’s OK. I’ve been rejected a lot of times and it doesn’t mean that I won’t be persistent in helping to find that project.

The bottom line: connections don’t just happen. You need to make them happen. The worst that someone can say when you approach them is no. It is a definite no if you don’t bother to ask!

An article in the business section of today’s USA Today caught my attention. More Dad’s Resist Business Travel, made me smile because it reinforces what I found in interviewing entrepreneurs for my book: men care about balance, too.

The article reports that nearly 50% of male senior executives surveyed indicated they were more likely to ask for less travel when negotiating a new job than they were five years ago. Additionally, 55% of the men said they were less willing to consider a job that required heavy business travel because of family demands.

I have suspected all along that men care about balance, primarily because I am married to a man who values flexibility. He believes that it is not just my job as mom to be available for our children – he has always been willing to share the parenting load. We are partners.

When I started looking for business owners to interview for my book, I was somewhat surprised by the number of men that were willing and eager to talk to me about more than just their business, but about their families as well. Across the board, the men I talked with valued their time with their children and felt that their entrepreneurship contributed positively to their kids’ upbringing. They talked as enthusiastically about their children’s accomplishments as they did about their company’s success. And we’re not talking about hobby businesses, here. All of the men (and many of the women) I interviewed had multi-million dollar businesses, and one, Rackspace, is even positioned to reach the $1B mark.

It will be interesting to see if men mirror the growing trend among women of starting businesses in search of flexibility. At a minimum, employers are starting to realize they need to be creative to keep not only women, but men as well. Finding alternatives to travel or allowing employees more control over their schedule is becoming a necessity to retain talent. I am convinced, however, that the best alternative for flexibility is to start your own business. After all, when you own the business you can usually control which 80 hours you work in a week.